Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm bleeding and have questions
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
