Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize