Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
