I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I need moral support for this bender
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
