He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Randomize
