quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
my being single is dangerous.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Damn victory sex feels great
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
