if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
