It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
