At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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