This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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