so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
We got so high we made milksteak
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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