My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
