why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
