I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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