Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
