i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
