hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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