i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
