I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
