***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
