carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
