let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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