I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
