You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
My vagina is officially offended.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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