He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
