The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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