she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize
