Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
