We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
