she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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