JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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