I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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