Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
