so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize