WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
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