i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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