oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
