Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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