This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
