You're my little dorito
i just had sex bonerless
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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