I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize