So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
