I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
