I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
