YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
