Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Randomize
