Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
We got so high we made milksteak
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
is it fun? or sober?
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