Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
