Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize