Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
